Ups and downs. That’s what happens in life. Specifically related to making money online and/or running ANY business for that matter, you ARE going to have ups and you ARE going to have downs. The following was inspired by a post I read today at Uberaffiliate. Thank you Paul for being real and mustering the courage to write something in a way that allowed me to put together some of my own downfalls. In reading this I want you to picture a journey. If this stuff bores you or makes you look at me in a different way then so be it. However , maybe after you see all the ugliness you can better understand measures I took to fix it and picked myself up MANY times to keep pushing forward.

We work in an industry where honesty and trust are an absolute must. More importantly in regards to my business and our team’s Affiliate Network it’s now more important than ever for publishers, advertisers and agencies and anyone else that might be interested to know all they can about us. Writing this post is one of the most controversial thoughts I have had and while the ramifications may possibly be devastating, we know that the publishers, advertisers and networks that we do business with on a daily basis know that we are sincerely trying to operate the most honest, trustworthy and profitable business for all.

There was a time when I was a bad guy. A REAL bad guy. Let’s start with some of the more obvious things that quite a few people know. I was a blackhat SEO. Your definition of blackhat is pansy-ass compared to mine. I did happen to get into auto content generation. It all started with Blogger.com.

What I did and the ramifications of what it caused.

I was at a point in my life where I gave up writing for other companies. (This is how I made my first money online). I was making what I thought was good money. Unfortunately, I am not going to “out” people I met. Let’s just say I got in with the wrong crowd. I began auto generating blogs on blogger.com. When I mean auto generating I am talking about 20 hours a day of blackhat blog making. I soon realized I was never going to “bank hard” unless I had help. I simply hired outsourced help from India. Long story short. I lost nearly $70,000.00 in accrued earnings for spamming and complaints. I was also banished from ever using blogger.com’s services again. It’s been around 3 years since I have been to the site.

When $70,000.00 leaves in a blink of an eye and all you had going for you disappears, its fucking depressing. Let’s add on to the fact that I was indeed a terrible husband and even though I was never told this to my face, at 20 hours work a day, being a terrible husband also made me a terrible father to my first child. Ultimately I got divorced. Lucky for me I am with the most amazing woman of my life and we eventually worked things back out. I cannot explain how terrible of a time that was for me. It got better though the moment we got back together. I got my chi back baby!

Only this time my ego and narcissism took the better of me. Braggin about being banned from Blogger.com was bringing me attention. As a matter of fact that attention is ultimately what led me into my next dumbass move. This attention brought on a new breed of people that I would eventually get into business with. This time around I learned that spamming myspace was quite profitable. So profitable that the products we were spamming, I happened to team up and create. In spamming myspace and being good at it, this brought on even more attention. Again, my ego came into play here. I was flattered. The worse off I left that social network, the better I felt. That’s completely fucked up. Your about to find out how fucked up it really got.

I got into more businesses with even sometimes worse people. I was able to get in on a project that created myspace profiles by the second. This brought a lot of attention I never expected. Myspace’s legal representation got involved and a shitstorm came. Back and forth for month’s things looked as if I was going to end up in court. However, I only thought myspace knew about the spamming. Remember when I just said that I got into business with even worse people? I had learned how to hack. I am not going to go into the truly juicy details. Let’s just it came to an ugly ending.

Again, I lost a lot of earnings. It was at this time also that I realize it was time for me to turn shit around. Again flattery got the best of me yet again. People I knew started talking and at this time I was known for “getting into it” with myspace. I put myself right back into the same damn place that got me into that situation in the first place. Although this time, it lead me into the cpa lead industry.

Here’s the part that is really going to disturb you.

I met a ton of people with a little bit of a reputation on my back. Unfortunately, these people were into gaming the system more than they were of legitimately sending good traffic. I started out with torrents. Yep, I completely did that shit. I moved into incentivization. It was the REAL incentive marketing at this time although I realize that the REAL money was actually incentivizing where it didnt belong. I knew very little about the cpa industry but I quickly learned that these METHODS were actually acceptable among MANY of the networks out there. Let me back up for a second here. I say networks but it was more so the affiliate managers who let this shit slide.

I am not going to sit here and make excuses that since affiliate managers let me do it, that it wasn’t wrong. It was however with the little knowledge I did have of the industry that actually kept it going. This actually lasted quite awhile. I never really paid attention to anything other than the incentive part of the industry and these methods that kept coming to me or ones I created myself. I never thought of the advertiser on the other end trying to make their living with their products.

My logic and thoughts get even worse…

Incentive marketing became tougher. Tons of people were doing the same thing I was and it put a real damper on things. More importantly, networks started becoming more compliant and actually caring. It was at this point that I became frustrated with everything. I became more and more knowledgeable of “scrubbing” and “skimming”. I was sending shit leads so what should I have expected right? When you dont really have all the knowledge of how it all works and your making killer money, I assure you that those thoughts barely graze you. It became worse and earnings dwindled. Upon the earnings dropping, I had to work harder than usual to maintain my pace. It was at this time that I said “fuck these networks” and started doing everything wrong. It got to the point of where I was indeed not even following the TOS of the networks and I did whatever I could to generate leads.

It came to a point where it just was not worth it anymore and I said “fuck this, I am giving the real deal a go”. I began into Pay Per Click marketing. At this time it was so much easier than it is nowadays. I had awesome campaigns and I had duds. Fortunately for me, my awesome ones built so big of a bankroll that I was able to explore so many ways of marketing online. PPC, Email, and Media Buys became really easy since I had the capital.

But I got bored…

I truly did. I got bored and had met up with some of the “associates” I worked with in the past. I was back into the blackhat scene full force. I was so into it that I actually agreed to Moderating a forum called Blackhatworld. Although I met a ton of sincere people with actually good intentions, the “bad apples” I met were REALLY bad apples. I got back into incentivizing but this time it was hardly legitimate. I mean we had operations of people going where we actually paid them money to fill out offers. Again, I wont make excuses but our advanced forms and methods we were using were WIDELY accepted among MANY networks and managers.

A Real Business Idea

Initially there were 6 involved with the thought of Convert2media. After the startup it slimmed down to four. I will tell you right now that I was fully aware of some of the types of publishers that would quickly follow suit to our network. I will also tell you that my mentality was “do whatever it takes” to create a successful network. It only took a month into our startup that I quickly realized that I was going down another path that would ultimately lead to bad things. This time ego was out the door. With all of us together and working we had so MUCH knowledge of cpa networks, managers, advertisers, publishers and methods out there. Instead of letting this in, we took a stance to keep it out. Instead of using this knowledge of “gaming the system” we put into use for the better good. With all of us being affiliates the hardships and bullshit we went thru OR got into only made us stronger on how to avoid it.

Burned bridges came with Convert2Media. We all had partnerships and associations with others that we had to end. Unfortunately in business this just comes with the territory. A lot of sacrifices were made and even more along the way. We quickly realized that being another bullshit network or manager and allowing this shit to go on was just not going to cut. We knew and realized that we could leave just being one man affiliate marketers and actually strive and work for something bigger than any one of us would or could have accomplished on their own. We may have started off on the wrong foot but it didnt take long to realize it and completely turn it around.

For the publishers, advertisers and networks we work with everyday, you already know this.

We dont want to be just another network on the block. Sure we are realists and realize we probably wont become the caliber of Hydra or Azoogleads or those other huge companies but that is just fine by us. We have never been happier or more focused in our lives than we are now. The people we have met and work with respect our honesty and I hope you do to.

I’m a prideful son of a bitch and I am very forward. I say fuck and shit a lot. I didnt come from a silver spoon fed background. I was internet retarded and still cannot design my own landing page. There is no excuse for the past but without the consequences of what I have done, who knows where I would have ended up. Sure it’s tough when you dont know everything. You have bills, divorces, kids to feed, and whatever else that may come along. You see success around you and it engulfs you. You become obsessed with it. You dont realize or even care what it takes to get there and you never once think about the people you are probably hurting in the process.

I will say this to anyone that reads this post. Think about what you have done or are currently doing. More importantly, think long and hard before you ever do ANYTHING in business. I’ve burned relationships with family, people, friends, partners, advertisers, publishers and networks. Had I known then what I know now, I would take it back in a heart beat. Unfortunately I cant. I can only do whats right in every thought and/or situation now and think about all aspects involved and make a decision if it’s good for our publishers, our advertisers, everyone we work with and ultimately our business. If it even smells like shit now, we dont allow it.

If the consequences of me being truthful hurts me, my reputation or our business I pay it gladly. At least now I have my head out of my ass and trying to do everything right in the way we conduct our business, our quality and our relationships with everyone we work with or come in contact with. At least now I’ve seen enough darkness to realize how good it feels to do things right by everyone and be in the light.

Life aint over when you hit the bottom folks. Whether you go bust in your marketing, a business sustains a hit, you ruin your reputation, you lose someone close to you. It doesnt matter. Until god personally says it’s time to go and finally dims your lights, it aint over. Dont give up. With some of the shit I have done online, some would think I should be in hiding right now. I’m not. I’m open, honest and I work my ass off in every aspect of business and life to ensure that everyone around me gets what is right.

Not a lot of people are comfortable with sharing such information like this. I dont think I have ever seen  someone in business to come out of nowhere online and completely lay it on the table. They are afraid of damaging their reputation. I assure you that when it finally “clicks” and you start being real and doing things right, the consequences bad or good from what people think of you are meaningless. The ONLY thing that matters is being honest with people and treating them right in business and in life. It sucks that it took me awhile to realize that. Dont let it happen to you.

It aint over when you hit the bottom.